Should I Strive for a Relationship, or Will It Fall into Place?

Hey, everyone. We have another great question: “Should I strive for a relationship, or will it fall into place?” 

Answer:

I can share a few ideas from the gospel of Matthew. I think this is a really good principle, whether you want a relationship or anything else. In Matthew Chapter 6, Jesus is teaching us not to worry and what we do with the things that we worry about or want.

Trusting God’s Provision

He talks about the flowers of the field and the birds of the air and how God takes care of them, making this point: If God’s going to take care of those things, surely he will take care of you and me as his children.

Matthew 6:26-30 NIV 

“Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you, by worrying, add a single hour to your life? And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon, in all his splendor, was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith?” 

Seeking God’s Kingdom First

But then, after Jesus says all of these things, in Matthew 6:33 NIV, he says:  

“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”

Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

So, I think we can apply this to this idea and this question, “Should you strive for a relationship?” 

I think that it’s a matter of what we are seeking. Are we seeking God’s kingdom and His righteousness? Is that the priority in our lives? If we grow in Him and fall more in love with Him, the Lord will help sort out these other things in our lives. 

Even these other desires, even if they’re good desires, we want to make sure that our first and foremost desire is seeking Him, his kingdom, and his righteousness. And the promise is all these other things will be added unto you.

Embracing the Season of Singleness

So, if you desire a relationship and feel like you’re striving for it, I would encourage you to pause that striving and focus on the Lord. 

Ask the Lord, “What does he want to do in your life during this season of singleness?” Maybe the Lord has a purpose for it. Maybe the Lord wants to develop some patience or maturity. Whatever He might want to do in this season of waiting upon Him, seeking Him, and then trusting in Him. Even this word, “not to worry about tomorrow and not to worry about a future relationship,” but the Lord will bring that in in due season.

So, I would say that you shouldn’t strive for a relationship. However, if you continue in Matthew Chapter 7, God also gives us the open door to ask and to pray and to ask Him for the things that we desire. 

Matthew 7:7-7 NIV says: 

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.”

So, this idea is that the Lord does want to answer your prayers, the Lord does want to bless us, and the Lord does want to give us the desires of our hearts. I think if we couple these two ideas where, we’re seeking first the kingdom of God, and that’s our first and foremost desire of His righteousness and His kingdom. We can also bring these prayer requests.

Praying for Your Desires

If you really want a relationship, ask the Lord. Ask the Lord if that would be His will for you and that you would keep asking and seeking those things. 

As our heart aligns with His heart, He’s going to help us with our prayers of what we need, what we want. But have that boldness to ask the Lord for the things, the desires of your heart, but ask Him in this place as well for wisdom of, “Lord, not my will, but your will be done.“

I hope this helps and applies to this question of wanting a relationship. Seek first God’s kingdom and His righteousness; make that priority number one. But then, number two, you can just take everything to the Lord, bring these requests to Him, and see how he will help sort that out in your prayer closet.

So, hope that helps. God bless you guys.

source https://calvaryyouth.org/biblical-answers/striving-for-a-relationship-a-biblical-perspective/